


Back and Worse than Ever

by MundyBundy



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-11
Updated: 2020-07-28
Packaged: 2021-03-03 21:40:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24662446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MundyBundy/pseuds/MundyBundy
Summary: A year has passed since the demise of Pennywise. The Losers club has moved on with their lives; Mike is leaving Derry, Bev got a divorce, and Richie came out publicly and started dating again. Life was good. But it wasn't going to stay that way. After a year-long dirt nap, Eddie is thrust back into the world of the living. His wife won't take him back, his job is a non-starter, and he needs to rebuild his life with the help of his friends.
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Richie Tozier/Original Male Character(s)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 32





	1. Chapter 1

Mike Hanlon had just finished putting the last piece of tape across his box of belongings and scribbled a short description of the contents across it’s top. Today was his last day in Derry, and to top it off, it was exactly a full calendar year after the group of Losers had come together to, quite literally, defeat their childhood demons. 

In the morning a moving van would come pick his belongings up and bring them to a storage unit closer to Bangor. He was finally getting out of dodge, hanging up his hat, putting the cows to bed, and every other saying for finishing it there was. He was moving out of Derry. 

His first stop would be Rhode Island, to see the massive houses on the Cape. The ones that sat on cliffs overlooking craggy, foggy New England shores and had servants’ hallways. He was looking forward to taking an audio tour around the properties.

Then on down to New York City, he’d meet up with Beverly and she was going to take him to all the museums and tourist traps he’s been dying to see since he was a kid. Central Park’s boats and Trinity Church and the Brooklyn Bridge. He wanted to do it all. After that? Who knows, he might head West towards Detroit and Chicago to see what Ben was up to, or might try going South to Florida and the Keys. For the first time in his life he didn’t know what was waiting for him, he felt free. 

From down the stairs, there was a knock on the door to the private quarters he lived in. He shouted down that he would be a moment before putting the box in place and descending to the door. It must be Emily, he thought. The library had found a new librarian, and she and Mike had been co-running it while she got situated in town. It was a Saturday night which meant the Library was closed tomorrow, which also meant it was their weekly drink night. Her turn to bring the Coors. 

He opened the door and immediately his stomach dropped. In front of him stood a wet and tired looking Eddie Kaspbrak, with blood coating his midsection and dried on his mouth.

“Fuck! W-We killed you!” Mike shouted, jumping back. It was Pennywise, it must be. He always went back to the same old “your dead friend is back from the grave” bit, time after time. 

Eddie’s eyebrows pinch together at that. 

“I died?” He and Mike, who had crouched into a defensive position, stared at each other for another moment before Eddie’s eyes rolled into the back of his head and his body met the hard library floor. 

He wouldn’t admit it to anyone, but Mike didn’t approach Eddie’s body for a good long while after that. Once he was sure it was corporeal and not a figment of his imagination. 

He was wet, disgusting really. But not the disgusting flavor that Pennywise’s usual tricks came in. He was bloody and pale and smelled like the floor drain of a bar bathroom, but there were no bugs crawling from his flesh or dripping hot viscera. This horror was merely of the human variety. 

As soon as it was clearly not an illusion, Mike was quick to move him from the floor up the stairs to his bed, counting on the adrenaline not to retch at touching Eddie’s sticky body. Breathing was shallow, pulse was weak, but when Mike lifted his shirt, his wound had knitted itself back together. There was a gnarly scar, but that was it. 

Did he call an ambulance? Did he call the police? Mike was panicking, walking back and forth beside Eddie’s unconscious form. He decided on Googling ‘How to Wake up Someone Who’s Unconscious’ first. 

Position the person on their back? Check. Raise their legs at least 12 inches above the ground? He rushed to tear open his packed boxes to look for pillows to shove under his legs. Loosen any restrictive clothing or belts? Mike couldn’t wrangle Eddie’s wet clothing off of him, so he grabbed a box cutter and carefully slit the slimy fabric until he could pull it off of him. Now Eddie was lying shirtless, legs raised, and Mike was still freaking out. 

He pulled out his phone and called the first person he could think so - Richie.

\--

Houses in LA were weird. They cost more money than most people will make in their entire lives, they have the most amazing views you’ve ever seen of the Pacific ocean, and rolling star studded hills; but they won’t have more than one bathroom. 

Richie was tapping his foot, (im)patiently waiting for the bathroom to free up, arms crossed in concentration. He had to think of dry things, the desert, saltines… His bladder gave a painful shout despite his attempts at mental fortitude.

Champagne always made him have to piss. Something about the bubbles… 

The party wasn’t even for anyone he knew, it was a bunch of his boyfriend’s friends. One of them landed a role in an Amazon Original Series. They had brought out a cake with sparklers, overflowing bottles of champagne, and served it to him in the infinity pool on the roof. It was… overdone to say the least. 

When Richie had landed his first Netflix special, he got trashed at a dive bar and spilled hot dog chili on his favorite pair of chinos. Every time he sees the stain it makes him feel queasy. 

Mercifully, the girl who had been reapplying a chunky layer of brown matte lipstick vacated the bathroom, and Richie immediately rushed in to take one of the top 3 longest pisses of his life. 

His phone started ringing almost as soon as he unzipped his fly, and he didn’t consider picking it up for a second. 

\--   
“Shit Rich, I really need you to answer me…” Mike cursed, then scrolled to the next Loser. 

Bill answered on the third ring, sounding cheerfully surprised at the call. 

“Hey Mike! What’s up?” 

“H-Hey Bill… I, uh, I,” He stared at Eddie lying there, feeling his stomach churn. 

“Mike?” 

“Eddie’s here,” He blurts out, feeling his pulse race as he does. It must be a hallucination. He inhaled too much sharpie when packing the boxes and he’s tripping, that must be it. 

“Ed-What? Mike what did you just s-say?” Bill’s voice immediately goes cold and quiet. 

“I can’t explain it, he’s here… he passed out and I brought him inside…. He’s alive Bill,” Mike kept his eyes trained on the body sleeping on his bed. 

“Eddie died, Mike… You know he died, we s-saw it happen,” His voice sounded so fearful over the phone and it made Mike swallow an apology. 

“I know! I know what happened, but…” On the bed, Eddie began to stir. It was both a relief and a worry, but Mike rushed over to him regardless. “I gotta go, he’s waking up,” Mike said, not waiting for a reply before ending the call.

“Eddie, Eddie can you hear me?” Mike asked, getting closer. He just groaned lightly, his voice was harsh. Desperate to do something to help his friend, Mike ran to get a glass of water from the kitchen, then hefted Eddie onto his lap and pressed the glass to his lips, talking to him the whole time. 

“I’m so sorry Eddie, I-If we knew you were alive… oh my god, I’m so sorry,” He kept babbling on, fear and shame and guilt swirling in his gut. It was all his fault, he’s the one who invited them back, he got Eddie hurt and then left him for dead in the sewers. 

Eddie’s eyes swam like he was unable to focus them, but he took a mouthful of water when it was pressed to his lips. Then he immediately coughed it all up, hacking and spitting and lurching away. His mouth was full of the dust and dirt and mud that was caked against every part of him. He was overwhelmed by the urge to vomit, so he did, right over the edge of the bed. It was nothing more than bile and gray water, and as he finished retching he gasped for the water, too weak to grab for it himself. 

Mike helped him drink it again, and this time Eddie managed to get a mouthful down, but it just came right back up with chunks of debris. Despite the fact that Mike prided himself on a hardy disposition, he needed to look away. It was downright painful to watch. 

Again and again he repeated the process of giving Eddie some water and him struggling to keep it down, or puking it down his front. Somehow the bandage from where bowers had stabbed him was still hanging on by a thread through all of this. 

Mike’s phone rang and rang, but he couldn’t move to answer it. The only time he left Eddie was to get more water. Distantly he thought about how Eddie would hate to know he was drinking straight from Derry tap water. 

It took three full glasses before Eddie was able to feel his tongue again, and stop himself from reenacting the exorcist again. He was panting, Mike was panting, they were soaking wet in all sorts of fluids. And still, the chime of Mike’s cell phone rang out over and over. 

“Answer your fucking phone,” Eddie croaked, and Mike obliged. 

“Mike! Mike, what’s going? Bill called me and said you saw Pennywise?” It was Bev, she was shouting. 

“No… no not Pennywise,” Mike said, heart still racing. He leaned against the wall and watched Eddie struggle to catch his breath. “It’s Eddie… Eddie’s alive,” 

“That’s impossible! Get out of there, it’s gotta be him again!” Bev started crying, and Eddie looked up at him. 

“Bev, Bev- no it’s really him… it’s not the clown,” Mike was starting to get choked up too when a cold shaky hand grabbed the phone from him. 

Eddie struggled for a moment before activating the video call feature, and dropped the phone back in Mike’s lap, collapsing on the bed again. 

Moments later Bev’s teary face appeared on screen. She even looked good when she cried. 

“M-Mike?” He picked up the phone and, understanding Eddie’s train of thought, showed her he was real. She gasped, sobbing into her hands. 

“Eddie! Eddie, oh my god, you’re alive!” She must have dropped the phone in shock, then quickly picked it up again. Eddie didn’t move, he just smiled weakly and focused on his breathing. Mike was relieved she could see him too and this wasn’t an awful fever dream. 

“See? No clown… But let me try to fix him up, I’ll call you back, alright?” He said, and she quickly agreed. 

Mike went to work, pulling out towels and washcloths and blankets for him. He helped Eddie down a few more glasses of water and clean the muck out from around his eyes and nose. As soon as he was able, Eddie passed out again. Under the blankets his smell was at least kept to a minimum. Mike was tempted to spray him with febreze while he slept. 

At the first chance he got for a reprieve he sent a text to Emily saying he wasn’t feeling well and tonight wasn’t going to work. Then he called back Bill, and Bev, and Ben, and tried Richie again. 

\-- 

Richie was in the back of the Lyft, pleasantly buzzed and feeling good. Leaving a party was his favorite part. The winding down once he got back home, being able to drop his guard and let his barriers down. 

His arm was slung around Jeremy, his boyfriend of seven months. It was the first time they were going back to their home, together, and it made Richie feel something like comfort instead of dread. He wasn’t bringing some random stranger back to his place, or parting ways to be by himself for the rest of the night. He finally had someone to fall asleep with, to watch movies with, someone who didn’t use him for his so-called fame. 

Jeremy was a touch younger than him, but not enough to turn heads. He was a writer, started in stand up comedy but found he was much more comfortable behind the scenes. He was safe, and stable, and let Richie have his meltdowns and oddities. He didn’t know about Pennywise or Derry, and he didn’t question why Richie held him so tightly at night with tears in his eyes. He was kind, and nice, and made Richie feel normal. 

Jeremy let his head drop to Richie’s shoulder, and Richie only spared the driver a glance before taking Jeremy’s hand in his own and brushing over his knuckles. 

“So are you bringing me home with you, or am I bringing you home with me?” Jeremy asked with a smile. Richie returned it and shrugged. 

“Well, you bought the Lyft, so I guess that makes me your conquest for the night,” Jeremy snorted a small laugh. 

“Conquest? What are you, 80?” 

Richie put on his best old man voice, leaning down to whisper in his boyfriend’s ear. 

“Now, back in my day, when one man loved another man very much, they waited until their wedding night to share the same bed,” The younger man squirmed and laughed and hit him playfully. 

“Wedding night, hm?” Jeremy raised an eyebrow, and Richie nearly choked on his spit at that. They had just moved in together, they hadn’t even discussed that far ahead yet. As if he could read his mind, Jeremy smiled and ran his hand up and down Richie’s thigh.   
“Well then, Mr. Tozier, would my conquest like to join me in the boudoir?” Richie chuckled and opened his legs wider, keeping an eye on the Lyft driver. They pulled up to the house and got inside, where Jeremy was eager to put his hands on Richie. 

One thing he liked about him was that Jeremy made him feel young. He always wanted more, and never took things slow. They had met when his manager, Steve, had Richie reinvent himself and work through some material with a well-known group of writers, including Jeremy. He didn’t laugh at all of Richie’s jokes, but offered constructive criticism even when it bordered more on the criticism end. Richie liked that. 

Richie laughed as he leaned down to take his shoes off and Jeremy dragged his hands over his back, raking his shirt up. He made all sorts of impatient noises when Richie sat on the bed, took off his glasses, and set them on the nightstand first before kissing him. They both tasted vaguely of alcohol and crab dip. 

His cell phone started buzzing in his pocket, and Richie grabbed for it, but Jeremy took his wrist and held it above his head, smiling the whole time. 

“Ooh, someone’s feeling feisty,” Richie teased. Jeremy dropped his head to the crook of his throat and Richie promptly forgot all about the phone.


	2. Chapter 2

It was a full eight hours before Eddie woke up. He was warm, too warm, and his stomach was killing him. Breathing hurt, so did opening his eyes. It was like someone had replaced all of his bones with ice and all of his blood with hot sauce, it felt like existence was rejecting him. 

Mike, who hadn’t slept a wink, was there as soon as he moved. 

“Eddie! Are you okay? What do you need?” He asked, a touch too loud. 

“M-Mike…,” He didn’t know what to ask for. What had happened? Where was everyone? Did they all die? Tears formed in his eyes at the sheer confusion and hurt and shock he felt. 

“Hey now, you’re gonna be okay, you’re alive Eddie. I don’t know how… but y-you’re back,” He smiled with as much reassurance as he could muster, and reached over to the box he was using as a makeshift bedside table. 

“Here, three advil and some more water. And before you say anything, I know you’re not supposed to take these on an empty stomach, so I have some chicken broth I’ll heat up, and bread when you’re ready for it. 

Wth his help, Eddie sat up and removed one of the thick blankets before downing all of the pills in one gulp, then finishing the entire glass of water. 

Mike was quick to return with the broth and two slices of wonderbread. 

“Now… Eddie, what do you remember from last night?” He asked, holding the bowl and giving him sips of the broth. 

“We-” He coughed again, his abdomen giving a painful spasm. “We fought It… Richie got caught … in the deadlights,” He said slowly. Then he moved his hand to his chest and felt the scars. 

“That’s it. Then I was here,” He looked to Mike, hoping he would fill in the blanks. The look Mike was giving him did not inspire confidence though. 

“You think… that all happened, last night?” He asked, and stopped giving him the broth. Eddie nodded weakly. 

“Eddie, that was a year ago. You died a year ago,” He put the bowl down and grabbed Eddie’s hands in his. Eddie was shaking his head, looking confused. 

“Where is everyone? Richie? Bev?” He glanced around and finally noticed everything in boxes. “Mike… I don’t understand,”

“Me either Eddie, I’m so sorry…B-But they’re all okay, they’re home. Here, look,” Mike pulled out his phone and flipped through pictures of his friends, all alive, all together. Bev and Ben at some awards ceremony together, Bill taking his dog on a hike out in the California wilderness, screenshots from Snapchats and Instagram stories, a bunch of Richie with a blonde guy at his side. 

“A year? Really? What happened to me?” He wondered aloud, and Mike gave his shoulder a tender squeeze. 

“Yeah. A whole year, to the day,” 

He stayed quiet for a while, breathing in and out and feeling his body. He was weak, and in pain, but no human being could survive an entire year without food or water. Not to mention the giant hole that had been punched through his chest. 

He started asking Mike to go over the events of the night he ‘died’. What happened after his memories got blurry. Richie had been holding him so tightly, that’s the last thing he could recall. He felt safe there. 

“What did you tell Myra?” He asked. It was odd that he wasn’t freaking out. He knew that he should be scared and panicking and in disbelief. But more than anything, a serene sense of nothingness had settled in his mind. It was like all of his anxious thoughts had spilled out at the bottom of the cavern and now his head was filled with cotton. 

“At the hospital, after we all got our injuries checked out, we gave a police report saying you had gotten trapped in the sinkhole, that a piece of rebar had pierced your chest, and you died down there… it’s not far from the truth really,” 

Eddie laughed at that, it was probably the biggest lie of omission he’d ever heard. 

“Richie called her and told her that… she didn’t believe him. She said you would never go into a condemned house with a bunch of strangers. She thinks you skipped town…” 

“Man, and if I show up now… she’ll kill me,” He sighed. All things considered, he didn’t really care if he stayed married to her. After re-learning about his youth of horror and munchausen's by proxy he endured, Eddie needed some time away from everything. 

“But you have to Eddie… sooner or later, right? She has your social security card, bank information, literally your entire life… Maybe it’s some small miracle that she didn’t think you were dead,” He said, and Eddie laughed hoarsely. 

“Maybe… But what do I tell her? If… if it’s really been a year… How can I face her and ask for her forgiveness?” 

“You just tell her you needed time away and say you’re sorry, simple as that. Unless you want to tell her you were actually killed by a shapeshifting space clown serial killer and were trapped underground in a magically induced coma for a year until you woke up completely fine and decided to come back,” He gave Eddie a look, but there was a smile under it all. 

“...Yeah maybe I’ll just stick with your idea then,” They both chuckled. 

“So, does everyone know then? That I’m uh… okay?” He started to pick at the dirt that was so far deep under his nails it was basically a part of him now. 

“Yeah, oh except Richie. I couldn’t get a hold on him last night,” Eddie felt his heart sink a little at that. His mind swam with Richie’s voice calling his name, his arms so tight around him. 

“Oh… hey Mike, could I uh… take a shower? Or maybe a bath? I’m not sure if I can stand up for too long, but if I sit here smelling myself any longer I might actually die,” Mike silently agreed and laughed at Eddie’s personality beginning to return. 

“I was wondering how long it would take for you to ask… of course buddy, let me run the water for you,” He got up to head towards the bathroom. 

“Oh and uh, Mike?” The other man looked back at him with a peaked eyebrow. 

“Can I use your phone to call Richie?” He loathed to admit it but he had an undeniable need to hear from Richie. Since he remembered everything post wake-up, his brain had just been static overtop of a neon picture of Richie’s dumb face. 

“Sure, password is 1234,” He said, tossing it on the bed. 

“Dude, I seriously hope you don’t use that password for other things, you’re going to get your identity stolen,” He said, punching the code in. Mike just laughed. 

\--

Richie blinked out of a dead sleep, his heart hammering. But it wasn’t like his usual nightmare wake-up. Jeremy was beside him, mumbling about something, and he reached over to grab his glasses, then his cell phone to check the time. Four in the morning, with seven missed calls. Eight from Mike, two from Bev, one from Bill, and one from Ben. What the hell? No voicemail, which was actually a relief because who the fuck leaves a voicemail? Then, before he could look further into it, another incoming call: Mike Hanlon. Again.

“Chee… turn off your phone,” Jeremy mumbled, using his foot to poke at Richie. 

“Sorry babe, gotta take this,” He said, pressing a quick kiss to the messy poof of blonde hair before getting up and stepping out into the hallway. 

“Hey Mikey, not that I don’t appreciate the wakeup call, but I don’t usually get up before the sun,” He said with a yawn. His brain was half asleep, but the oddity of all of his friends blowing up his phone all night kept him up long enough to care. 

“Richie,” The voice on the other end breathed his name like a sigh of relief, and Richie felt his blood turn to ice. His anxiety meds kept him level headed in most scenarios, car accidents, missed jokes, fight with his boyfriend… but they weren’t strong enough to block out the wave of panic that set in at the sound of his name in Eddie’s voice. “Richie… it’s Eddie, I-”

“Fuck you. No. No it’s not, Eddie’s dead.” His voice was low and angry and on the last two words he felt tears start to run down his face. “Can’t you leave us alone? Wasn’t taking him, and taking Stan enough? You really have to stick around in my fucking dreams too?” He gasped, the phone in his hand beginning to shake. He had to repeat in his head that it wasn’t real, it couldn’t hurt him, even if this one felt particularly real. 

“Rich… no it’s really me. I-I’m here with Mike, in Derry. I’m alive Richie, we don’t know how, but-”

“No! No you’re not! You’re dea- He’s dead. Eddie is gone…” He felt his throat get tight, and he squeezed his eyes shut, sobs trapped in his chest. He’s been through this song and dance enough times to know how it goes. 

“Richie! Shut up and look at your fucking phone… please,” The voice said. At that, Rich let out a sad laugh, but humored the request, and clicked accept on a FaceTime notification, mostly out of a morbid curiosity. 

“See now, you can’t be Eddie because he would never have said … please….” Richie’s voice died in his throat as the screen lit up to show a pale and skinny version of the boy who had died in his arms a year ago. He was smiling sheepishly, looking so, so tired. A look that didn’t suit him in Richie’s opinion. 

For once in his life he was speechless, staring at the screen like he wanted to burn it into his mind. The rest of the world fell away and all that mattered was the few inches of screen he held in his hand. 

So many questions raced through his mind, but he ended on How? How did he come back? How was he okay? Richie desperately wanted to see all of him in person, all 5’ 9” of his angry little body. He wanted to make sure there was no hole punched through his chest, nothing missing or hurt, Richie wanted to hold him close and never let anyone harm him again. 

The rush of intense emotions was dizzying, he slid down the wall behind him and just stared at Eddie, who was looking a little teary eyed himself. 

“Hey Trashmouth… you could have answered the first five times you know,” 

“I…” He had to clear his throat. “If I knew it was you Eds, I…” He could feel his heart hammering in his chest. “I would have told your mom to roll off of me way sooner,” Eddie glared at him, then let his mouth slide into a smile. They let the silence stretch for a few more moments before Eddie turned to look off screen and he heard Mike’s voice say something indistinguishable. 

“Hey… I gotta go take the world’s longest bath, and then burn my clothes, but I’ll give you a call soon, okay? Just wanted you to know that I… I’m… yeah,” Eddie smiled and Richie dug his nails into the palm of his free hand to stop from visibly sobbing on camera again. 

“Yeah, of course… no problem. Talk to ya soon Eds,” 

“Don’t call me that,” He said fondly, and ended the call. 

Richie stayed there, unable to look away from the black glass of his screen. His mind was blank except for one thought. Eddie. The hallway began to get brighter as the light of dawn appeared over the rolling hills of LA. And even though his ass was completely numb and his back would be killing him later, he couldn’t bring himself to move from the spot. 

\--

As it turns out, one tub full of water wouldn’t be enough to get Eddie clean. Within minutes he was in a stew of nasty brown water that was triggering the alarm bells in his head. Even so, he was so exhausted and had to keep biting his tongue in order to stay awake. Mike left him with one measly washcloth that he had to keep rinsing off before scrubbing at a spot a few times with what little strength he did have. The other man had helped him strip down and get in the tub, which was embarrassing enough. He offered to help wash him, but Eddie staunchly refused, having to draw a line somewhere. 

The smell of the soap was heavenly when it broke through the funk. If he didn’t have OCD about health issues before, this is exactly the type of traumatic event that would cause it. 

By the time he had gotten to his legs he was panting. 

“How you doing Eddie?” Mike asked politely from outside of the bathroom. He sighed and let go of the washcloth watching it sink into the murky depths. He knew if there was any hope of him getting passably clean he would need Mike’s help. 

“...I could use a hand,” 

God bless Mike Hanlon. He brought in a towel big enough to cover Eddie’s crotch and let the nasty water drain away. Then he filled the tub again with warm water and got to work ridding Eddie of most of the dirt from his body. It felt really nice actually, to have someone wash him gently. If it weren’t for the burning embarrassment, he would have enjoyed it. 

When it came time for his hair, they had to get a cup for Mike to pour over his head like an infant. They had to repeat this several times until the water ran clear. Finally they gave him a last rinse and Mike helped him out again, handing him another large towel to use to dry and a set of spare clothes, then he left once more. 

Although his legs wobbled beneath him, Eddie managed to get back to the bed. In the other room he could hear Mike speaking to someone.

“He really seems fine… weirdly fine,” Eddie furrowed his brow, annoyed. He hated people talking about him like he wasn’t there. Then he remembered that not five minutes earlier Mike had been scrubbing his armpits and felt guilty. 

“He’s just finishing up in the bathroom now, I’ll let him know you called…. Yes, I’ll text you with any updates… Alright…. Yes, okay… Richie I’m gonna hang up on you,” Eddie’s ears perked up, Richie was calling about him? “Hah, yeah yeah.. Bye Rich. Say hey to Jeremy for me,” 

Mike came back into the room, looking surprised to see Eddie there. 

“Glad to see you with clothes on,” He chuckled, to Eddie’s embarrassment. “How’re you feeling now?” 

“Better, thanks…” Eddie said, feeling the weight of his eyelids return to him fully. His body was going to rest whether his mind wanted it or not. Mike sat beside him and looked at him like they needed to talk about something important. Despite his body’s protests, Eddie sat up slightly and gave Mike his attention. 

“So Eddie, I’m glad to have you with me as long as you need… but you may have noticed the boxes… “ He gestures around them, and Eddie nods. “And I was actually planning on today being my final day in Derry… you caught me on my last day here,” 

“Oh,” Eddie said, and felt his heart give a thump of anxiety. 

“So I wanted to know what you want to do, if you want to come with me…” 'Or go back to New York' is the unsaid part of that. “I’m sorry to drop this on you…” 

“No, don’t be! Dude you’ve done more than enough for me…Can I just uh… think about this for a while?” 

“Yeah, of course… just uh, the movers are coming in a few hours, so you know.” Mike went back to the kitchen, re-packing the boxes he’d ripped open in his haste to help Eddie. The smaller man laid back, sighing his frustration away.

“Shit” Eddie mumbled to himself, closing his eyes.


	3. Chapter 3

“Eddie?” His eyes snap open to Mike, and two men in brown jumpsuits. “Hey bud, sorry to wake you. They gotta take the bed,” He looked apologetic. 

“Wha… “ he blinked wearily at them, before sitting up slowly. The two movers tried not to stare at him while they waited, and Mike noticed. 

“Hey guys, why don’t you take five? I’ve got some drinks in the fridge still, help yourself,” He said politely, and they seemed to jump at the chance. Eddie struggled to get up, his muscles screaming in protest. 

“Sorry… I didn’t mean to fall asleep for so long…” Eddie rubbed at his face with one hand, groaning. He had no idea what to do, nowhere to go and no one to go to. He had woken up without a wallet or a phone, no car or ID. He was at a loss. 

“Mike… what do I do?” He asked after the other man helped him to the bathroom to sit on the toilet lid. 

“Like I said, you’re welcome to come with me. I was going to stop through Rhode Island but I can drive straight to New York if you want to get everything settled with Myra,” Mike sat opposite him on the edge of the bathtub while they talked. Eddie sighed, not thrilled to put himself in that situation, but understanding of the necessity. 

“If she thinks I left her for another woman I’m gonna assume she’s gotten rid of all of my stuff. Could we also add the bank and a clothing store to that list of stops?” 

Mike smiled and his eyes lit up.

“Sure. And y’know, Bevvie lives in the city, I’m sure she’d be happy to see you if you’re up for it,” Eddie returned the smile, and nodded. 

“No promises on how much I can do, but I’d really like that,” 

\-- 

Sometime after the sun had risen, the door to the bedroom opened and Jeremy slunk out with a yawn. He nearly stepped on Richie in his grogginess, and let out a small yelp in surprise. 

“Chee, what are you doing on the floor?” He asked. 

Richie didn’t say anything, his brain felt like it had been wrung out. He just looked up at Jeremy, feeling so many emotions and unable to voice a single one of them. But Jeremy’s face softened and he leaned down, placing a hand on Richie’s shoulder.

“Richie… You okay?” And at those words, Richie swallowed thickly. He looked into Jeremy’s face, searching for the right way to explain it. Truly he wanted to say something, to stop his heart from aching. He was elated but also ridden with guilt and disbelief. They had left Eddie down there, and Richie was all the way out in California, living his life and actively trying to forget about the events of the last year. 

Jeremy didn’t know anything about Derry or Pennywise. He knows that Richie lost a friend, and that it had taken a harsh emotional toll on him, but nothing more than that. Seven months ago he was just another writer hired to make Richie funny. And even though he’s met Bill and Ben and Bev in person at various get-togethers over the months, and he understands and respects their friendship; Jeremy has never and will never be a part of it. In that moment, his boyfriend’s patient smiling face, with his baby blue eyes and soft blonde hair, warped into a complete stranger before Richie’s eyes. He could feel the world falling away and his eyes flitted around the room wildly in an effort to stop looking at his boyfriend. 

“Rich… what’s going on?” His voice was dipped in care and worry and so much genuine compassion it made Richie sick. Jeremy’s hand went to his cheek but Richie shook his head and flinched away. He needed to get away, his body was panicking and his mind was dissociating. But when he went to tell Jeremy, he couldn’t open his mouth. 

“Hey… are you having a panic attack?” Jeremy didn’t move away, he waited for Richie to respond first. Eventually Richie was able to nod his confirmation. 

“Okay, do you want me here?” He asked. They’ve been through this song and dance before. It hasn’t happened in a long time, but Richie’s therapist gave him some good tips for de-escalating and how his boyfriend can help. At first he felt like a jerkoff counting to 10 and taking deep breaths, but they did help. 

“Rich… do you want me to leave you alone?” He asked again, and Richie pressed his lips into a thin line. Looking at Jeremy’s caring expression was too much. He felt so far away, so foreign. Richie was lost in his head and it was full of sand and bad dick jokes. 

“It’s okay if you do... “ Jeremy added, and at that Richie nodded again. His boyfriend nodded back and stood up, offering a hand. “Alright I’ll leave you alone but you gotta get off the floor first.” 

And he did. Richie went into the bedroom and laid down, still clutching his phone. Jeremy closed the blinds and shut the door and went to sit in the living room. Now, despite being achingly alone, Richie was at least able to hide his shame and fear and guilt in the dark. 

\--

With the bed and the last of the boxes packed away into the moving truck, Mike was officially done living in Derry, now all that was left was to leave. 

Eddie had stayed sitting down in the main area of the library, which was closed since it was a Sunday. He found one of Bill’s books in a hometown authors section and was flipping through it. 

“Alright Eddie, sorry to keep you waiting, the movers are bringing the truck over to the storage unit now, I just need to lock up and drop the keys to the landlord,” Mike announced, poking his head inside the main entrance. 

“No worries man, it’s been kind of nice to relax for a while… I can’t remember the last time I read a book,” He held up the cover to show Mike, who instantly recognized it. 

“Ah, A Pact of Blood volume two… not Bill’s best work I hate to say,” He chuckled, walking over to the ancient couch Eddie had settled in.

“Yeah it’s a bit… “ Eddie searched for the right words before flapping his hand in the air.

“Awful?” Mike supplied, and they laughed. “He falls into so many tropes, the characters are one dimensional, their growth and character arcs are superficial… Trust me I’ve told him all this to his face too,” Eddie wasn’t surprised. Mike had probably read more books than Eddie could even name, he was a definite authority on what constituted good writing. 

“I mean… I didn’t say it,” Eddie closed the book. “What has he written that isn’t hot garbage?” 

Mike went to the same display and selected a smaller volume. He handed it over to Eddie, and it’s title read ‘Requited’. 

“Requited? Sounds more like a romance than horror… “ Eddie flipped it over to check the description and saw Bill’s cheesy black and white author’s photo, turtleneck and all. 

“Yeah… it’s dark, but not like his usual stuff. More realistic. It’s about a girl who had a head injury and forgot everything until her 27th birthday. She meets a guy and they start dating, but she starts rediscovering all this stuff about her past and who she really is, and realizes that the guy she’s dating isn’t who he says he is either. It’s pretty riveting, and not filled with bad sex scenes like his other stuff,” Eddie nods along, wondering what influences Bill took from his own experience with horror and loss of memory to write it. “Why don’t you take it with you, give it a read.” 

“But we’re not coming back…” Eddie raised an eyebrow and Mike winked. 

“It can be a long term rental,”

\-- 

They got on the road soon after that. Mike helped Eddie to his Subaru and they dropped his keys off before driving out of town. Both of them flipped off the “Come back soon!” Sign at the edge of Derry. 

Eddie fell asleep almost instantly after they hit the highway, and would drift in and out of consciousness as Mike changed the podcast they were listening to or stopped for gas. His dreams were shockingly vivid, but devoid of any substance. He was always in a dark, cold world, floating without a body and staring out at a darkness that was both massive and oppressive. He woke up more exhausted than when he fell asleep, with his heart pounding wildly. 

They stopped for food at a little brewery that Mike had been meaning to check out. It was just off the highway and only added about 5 minutes to their travel time. It was about sunset when they sat down at a table. 

“Not too much longer, about an hour give or take…” Mike said with a yawn, stretching out his limbs while he had the chance. Eddie nodded, checking out the menu and feeling hunger knot up his stomach. “We’re gonna go straight to Bev’s place… she offered her guest room,”

“Okay… I can’t believe she lived in New York city this entire time and I never knew… I was so close,” Eddie could imagine an alternate timeline where they remembered each other, and he and Bev would get brunch regularly. It made him a bit sad to think of all the lost time. 

“So uh… not to pry, but how are things between Ben and Bev going?” Eddie asked after putting in an order for a personal pizza with goat cheese, bacon, and arugula on it. 

“Well, they uh… they aren’t ‘going’,” Mike said. “After last year, Bev went back, got a divorce, and Ben stayed in Chicago. I think they’re waiting for the other one to make the first move,” 

“What? That’s so stupid, they looked ready to run off together at the townhouse,” Eddie huffed, and Mike agreed. 

“Well… Bev had to settle things with her ex, and he didn’t make it easy on her. Plus Ben would never push her, you know,” 

They chatted about their friends’ lives over an appetizer of truffle french fries that Eddie was drooling over. Eddie learned that Bill had a dog and he and Audra were doing well, living out in California. Mike knew a lot about his life out there, he spoke animatedly about Bill’s newest book and the awards it was nominated for. 

“So uh, how’s Richie doing?” Eddie asked, not sure why the question made his heart give a loud thump. 

“He’s great actually… got back on the wagon after the show he bombed last year. He fired those ghost writers and started doing a new set. He uh…” Mike glanced down at his beer, debating something in his head. 

“It’s really not my place to say, but you would have found out sooner or later…” Mike said, and gave Eddie a polite smile. “Richie is gay, he came out after everything last year,” 

Eddie’s mouth formed a small ‘o’ in surprise. He didn’t have any idea, although his sense for these type of things was never great to begin with. 

“Really? Mr. ‘I fucked your mom’ is gay? That’s uh… that’s great, I’m glad he’s doing good, I mean- not that being gay makes you ‘good’ automatically. But uh- not that being gay is bad! I think it’s great! Great, really.” Eddie tripped over his words and physically felt his cheeks turn red as he continued to stumble through. 

“Calm down, I get what you’re saying,” Mike laughed. “We’re all happy for him… he’s been with his boyfriend now for … eight months I think?” Eddie felt his stomach do another flip at that. 

“Boyfriend? He has a boyfriend? Who is it? Another famous person? Do you have pictures? Oh, was it that blonde guy in his profile picture?” Eddie remembered back to the day before when Mike had shown him some photos of the Losers. 

“Yeah, it is. Here,” He fished his phone out and handed it over to Eddie. Their food came out just then but Eddie let it sit in favor of snooping on Richie’s life. His instagram feed was about half garbage nonsense and half clout pics. He would post a subway rat gnawing on a slice of pizza, and then a photo of him and his boyfriend at a winery out in Sonoma. 

“What’s his name?” Eddie looked to Mike, who was three bites into a chicken sandwich. 

“Jeremy… Bev has met him before too. I think there’s a picture of them together,” 

And sure enough there was. All smiles and suits and Richie had an arm so casually around Jeremy’ waist. He then clicked through to look at Jeremy’s profile. A much cleaner timeline that was Richie-centric for the most part. One photo made him clench his jaw tightly, and hand the phone right back to Mike. It was the two of them in bed together, morning sunlight trailing across them. Richie was asleep with his glasses off and his chest hair trailed below the white comforter. Jeremy was snuggled up against him and smiling tiredly at the selfie. 

“Wow… Never would have guessed,” He said, and began to take a piece of his pizza, but he was less hungry than before. 

\--

After a day of moping, Richie finally emerged from the bedroom. He was tired, and sick of looking at his phone. Jeremy had spent the day cleaning the house it seemed, and was just walking through the door with groceries.

“Oh! Perfect- could you grab the rest of the bags from the trunk?” He asked, dropping a kiss on Richie’s cheek as he passed. Without a word Richie grabbed several reusable bags filled with snacks out of the car. 

They put the groceries away and Jeremy went up to Rich, taking his hand.

“Feeling better?” He asked, and Richie nodded. “Good. Now how about we-” Richie’s phone began to ring and he grabbed for it quick. “Babe… maybe put it away for now?” Jeremy placed his hand over the phone in his hand, but Richie pulled away. 

“I’m sorry.. I need to take this,” He mumbles, and walks back outside mechanically, closing the door behind him. 

It was Eddie. Well, it was Mike’s phone, but he knew who was on the other end of the line. 

He took a deep breath and clicked accept. 

“Hello?” He hated how formal he sounded. How much like his father he sounded. 

“Hey Rich… just uh, checking in? Hah sorry, I’m sure you have better things to be doing than talking to me-”

“I don’t- uh I … I don’t actually,” He said too abruptly, then tried to laugh it off. “What could be more important than you Eddie Spaghetti?” The words came out too sincere, too close to the chest for Richie’s liking. 

“Well, your boyfriend maybe?” He said, liked he’d finally been clued in to a secret. The words made Richie’s throat tighten with a coil of guilt. 

“He gets more than enough time with the ol’ Trashmouth, I’m sure he appreciates the break…” Richie glances back at the door, leaning casually against the side of the house. 

“How are you doing? Are you still in Derry?” Eddie laughed on the other side of the line, and Richie drank it in. That laugh is why he tried so hard to be the class clown, that laugh was always his goal. He heard it in his dreams, the high pitched nasal chuckle sound that could so easily be mistaken for a scoff. 

“Dude, for once I want you to talk more about yourself… I’m fine, on the road to New York city with Mike. But you! You’re ... dating someone?” He made a noise of astonishment that had Richie’s mouth going dry. “I mean, I really never thought…” Eddie floundered with his words and Richie could almost see his expression getting scrunched and pink. 

“What? You never thought I’d be gay? Or that I’d find someone to date me?” Richie had gotten this call a dozen or so times from his friends, family, and business contacts. His mom had told him she always supported his ‘alternative lifestyle’ and this is no different. Bev had said that he wasn’t allowed to dress like a hobo anymore since he was gay. 

“Wha-No! I mean don’t get me wrong, I bet he’s gotta have the patience of a saint to deal with your bullshit, but I always knew there was someone out there for you.” Now it was Eddie’s turn to be sincere. “I’m happy for you Rich,” 

“...Thanks Eds,” Richie closed his eyes against tears threatening to spill. They stayed quiet for a minute, and then there was the sound of footsteps in the background. 

“Hey Richie… “

“Yeah?” 

“I gotta go, Mike’s back and we’re gonna get on the road,” 

“Oh,” Richie wanted to tell him to stay on the line anyways, he needed to hear his voice. “Well, gimmie a call when you get to New York?” 

“Sure. Of course,” Eddie didn’t sound too eager to end the call either, or maybe it was just Richie’s desperate brain making things up that weren’t real. 

“You’re gonna meet up with Bevvie in the city, right?” 

“Mm Hm. Then go see Myra,” 

“Oh,” 

“Yeah.”

“Good Luck,”

“Thanks, Rich,” 

“Yep.

“...Well, I’ll talk to you later,”

“I’ll be here,” 

“Bye,” 

“Bye, Eds”

\--

Eddie looked down at the phone with Richie’s dumb face on the ended call screen. He didn’t know why, but he felt a small bubble of anger come to the surface. 

Maybe it was the fact that all of his conversations with his friends had been five minutes or less, and he didn’t have any control over his own life at the moment. 

Or maybe it was how alone he felt, despite being with Mike. His clothes weren’t his own, he had no money or personal belongings, and no knowledge from the past year. He almost wanted to cry. 

Mike walked up to where he was, leaning against the parked car, and handed over a plastic bag filled with items. There was a toiletries kit, a pack of gum, beef jerky, some energy drinks, a newspaper, and canned coffee. There was also a thick plastic flip phone and a prepaid card to load into it. 

“What is all this?” Eddie asked. 

“It’s for you, just some snacks and drinks for the ride. You could probably use the extra calories,” Mike smiled and walked around to the drivers side after taking his phone back from Eddie. “And now you can stop using all my phone’s minutes,” 

“I’m so sorry dude. As soon as I get my bank card-” 

“I’m kidding Eddie. Don’t sweat it, really,” They buckled up and got back on the road, with Eddie feeling a bit better. He fiddled with his burner phone, added in the Losers’ numbers and Myra’s, which he knew by heart. 

But he couldn’t call her, not just yet. He wouldn’t even know what to say to her. 

\--

Jeremy was sitting at the table when Richie walked back in, he looked worried. 

“Everything okay?” Richie nodded, and sat across from him. 

“Yeah.. everything’s okay,” He took his glasses off and rubbed at his eyes with a sigh. 

“Wanna talk about it?” He laced his fingers together and looked at Richie expectantly. 

No. But apparently you do, Richie thought. He put his glasses back on and crossed his arms. 

“It’s nothing. My friend from back home… you know Eddie, the one who died when that old house collapsed?” 

Jeremy immediately straightened and nodded his head. He’d spent many nights comforting Richie over it. 

“He… called me this morning,” Jeremy’s eyebrows shot up. “He was with Mike. Showed up at his house with complete amnesia since the accident. He’s alive,” 

“No way… Really?” 

“Yeah. That’s why I was all…” He gestured wildly at his head, and Jeremy’s expression softened. 

“Oh Rich… that’s not nothing. That’s… well that’s really crazy! I mean, no wonder you panicked, who wouldn’t?” He got out of his seat and came to hold Richie’s hands in his. 

“I’m okay now, I just…” He looked down at their joined hands and sighed. “I really want to see him… I want to make sure he’s okay, y’know?” Richie felt a little better at having admitted that much. 

“Of course you do, I don’t blame you,” Jeremy said, and ran a hand over his wild hair. “Where is he? Does his wife know?” Richie shrugged, not giving Myra much care. Her actions upon Eddie’s initial ‘death’ had her written out of Richie’s book for good. 

“He’s on his way to see her. But I don’t think it’ll be a happy reunion,” 

“You should meet them in New York,” Jeremy suggested like it was nothing. He had a smile on his face and he looked so sincere it hurt. 

“I can’t do that… he’s going to see his wife… and he’s probably dealing with a lot right now,” Jeremy raised an eyebrow in question.   
“And I’m sure he could use a friendly face… Richie you and your friends are - no offense- the most co-dependant adults I’ve ever met.” Jeremy said with a smile. Richie had to laugh at the truthfulness of it. “Go for a long weekend, help him out. And say hi to Beverly Marsh for me, ‘kay?” 

Richie put his hands over Jeremy’s smaller ones and smiled quietly. 

“Okay. Okay I’ll go to New York, you win” Richie dropped a kiss to his knuckles and leaned closer to his boyfriend, feeling that tight coil of nerves begin to relax at the prospect of seeing Eddie in person. 

“Good. Now how about you buy a plane ticket and I’ll make us some late lunch,” Richie nodded in agreement, pulling his phone back out to buy the first cross country flight he saw. 

There was a text with an image from an unknown number on his screen, and he opened it. An awkwardly smiling selfie from Eddie greeted him, along with a short message in the group chat. 

Hey guys -- new phone. It’s Eddie.

Richie saved the photo and made him a contact, spending probably a few seconds longer than needed looking at the grainy, low quality selfie. He couldn’t stop smiling over it, feeling hope swell in his chest for the first time in months. 

“I’ll be there soon Eds…” He said quietly, and opened up his Delta app.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi all! Hope you like it so far. I haven't written for IT before but I love Richie and Eddie and I promise they will get together by the end of this!!


End file.
